"If I leave you, it doesn't mean I love you any less.."

.April 1, Bangalore International Airport
I left Shanti Bhavan at two a.m. – in the middle of the night, just the way I arrived. It was strange to leave when no one was awake, like I was sneaking off or something, but I suppose it’s a good bookmark to the experience to come and go at the same time. As I made the drive away from the school, where everything looked so familiar, I remembered back to the night I came, when I was confused and tired and had no idea where I was. How quickly this place became home…
Yesterday was an incredible day. I got up, taught my classes, and at the end of each class, I was tackled by all of the kids who were all trying to hug and kiss me at the same time. I received tons of letters, some for me, some for my family, and some for new American pen-pals. I started packing a bit in the afternoon, but I put it off as long as I could because I was in denial about leaving. At the end of the school day, we had a normal assembly, but – as with all of the volunteers when they leave – at the end, I was given my send-off. Four children from my fourth and fifth grade classes gave short speeches about me, and I was given a beautiful card made by Bina, my eleventh grade student who is the dancer. I got up and thanked everyone and cried, of course, and then the volunteers gave a small performance. I sang a few songs, some of the others performed a Shanti Bhavan rap, and then we all sang a song together. I can’t describe what a rush it is to perform for the school. The kids are such an appreciative audience and they love everything we do. Every time I get up on stage for them I feel like a star. They all loved the show and afterwards, the volunteers had a “meeting” with Dr. George and Mrs. Law in the volunteer house. The meeting turned out to be a gathering with some special snacks that had been arranged in honor of my departure and the departure of one of the teachers who is leaving at the end of the term. I was so touched that I was included in the reason for the celebration and I felt really honored.
I went to my last choir rehearsal and the kids were so dear. They said they had a surprise for me and they sang “For Good” from Wicked to me. I cried again, of course, and when they were finished, I was planning to thank them and give a little inspirational speech, but instead I was tackled, hugged and kissed until I felt like I was going to fall over. It was awesome!
Then I took a walk around the grounds and just sort of said good-bye to the school. It was an incredible night – clear sky so there were millions of stars, and a crescent moon like I have never seen before. The air was cool and breezy and I just felt so grateful for every moment I spent in that wonderful place. I think that’s one of the things I will take away from my time in India. I’ve never been very good at having religion, but I believe in God and I believe in gratitude. It may sound a little cheesy, but you can really feel God in a place like this… and I’ve been working on letting Him/Her/It whatever God is, know that I am thankful for all I’ve been given. It’s made me feel a lot better. I came to India hoping for a change, hoping to have my heart opened again and hoping to come away with a renewed sense of my artistic purpose. I got what I came for. I left Shanti Bhavan with a heart bursting to the brim with love and faith in the future. I thank everyone who helped me get here and everyone I met since I’ve been here for giving me that priceless gift.